April 2, 2025. Six-time bankruptcy filer Donald Trump announced new tariffs for all major countries in the world except Russia. Dubbing the day “Liberation Day,” Trump said the tariffs would spark an economic boom, help the US pay off its debt, “and it will happen very quickly.”
Though Trump is familiar with being in debt, those familiar with making money have said the tariffs will “slow down growth,” “set the tech sector back a decade,” be “disastrous in the long run” and lead the US into a “self-induced, economic nuclear winter, and we should start hunkering down.” In what can only be described as related news, in the two days following Liberation Day, the Dow Jones Industrial Average had the third and sixth largest daily point losses in its 129-year history.
Proving that Small Penis Syndrome is not strictly an American problem, and because studies have shown that men overcompensate when their masculinity is threatened, China President Xi Jinping responded to the increase of tariffs on China’s exports to the US by increasing tariffs on US exports to China from 34% to 84%. Unconfirmed reports from XiJinpingHasASmallPenis.com say that when asked “why 84%?” Xi Jinping responded, “because my penis is 84 inches long.”
Insiders say Trump was not impressed with the size of Xi Jinping’s tariffs and is now preparing to retaliate with “184-inch tariffs.”
Donald Trump Has A Small Penis? 
So what do you think?